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style of personal statement

Discussion in 'Personal Statements and UCAS forms' started by jess82, Oct 6, 2006.

  1. jess82

    jess82 New Member

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    dear all,

    does anyone out there know what style of personal statement is most suitable?? the reason being is that my sister thinks i am missing the point of "personal statement". she thinks mine is just a CV presented in paragraphs instead of bullet points, and that i write too much about achievements, work experience, skills etc. she thinks that if i want to satnd a chance in this tough competition, i need to write another piece and this time make it different, ie. write about what type of person i am without a word on my achievements or experience. she thinks i need to leave this kind of talk to the interview.

    honestly, i dont really agree with my sister, but i dont want to ignore her opinion cos she has a point. i do agree with her that my statement does appear to be "another one of those" and far from memorable or outstanding. How do/ did you guys out there make yours exciting/ fun to read whilst keeping all the valid points in?? please help!!!!!!!!

    thanks
    jess
     
  2. anusha21

    anusha21 New Member

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    ummmmmmmmmmmmmm 1st thing DONT DO BULLET POINTS!!!
    paragraphs with r enough!
    u shud talk about ur wrk exp, achievements as how will they about it other wise? i mean theyre not gonna call evry1 to an interview juz 2 kno wot they did r they?? i think my PS is pretty gud (Sent off my ucas) n got quite a few ppl 2 read it (includin sum dental students-applyin 4 den) mine was like dis
    1st para 1st interest in dentistry
    2nd & 3rd wrk exp
    4th 5th n 6th volun wrk
    7th school stuff prefect etc
    8th hobbies etc
    9th final para again y dentistry
    u cud include wot type of person u r in the endin para n mayb the begg?
    i made sure that there was a link 2 dentistry sumhw or the other in nearly evry line like teamwrk as dentists hav 2 wrk as a team etc so as long as u do dat n hav a gud begg n endin u shud b ok i think!:) hope i helped.....
     
  3. jess82

    jess82 New Member

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    anusha21,

    thanks for your reply. my statemnt is very similar to yours structurally, and every sentence contains a skill or something to ensure i score points as the tutors read along.

    thanks for your reassurance, it's nice to know that we dont necessarily need to do wild to stand out from the crowd. at the end of the day, i think point-scoring is the important in this process, isn't it?!?

    thanks
    jess
     
  4. anusha21

    anusha21 New Member

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    lol yea i kno wot u mean i wanted mine 2 stand out 2 but it doesnt really hav 2 stand out as long as its gud!
    dats wot i was thinkin 2 point scorin i think its important 2 n ive mentioned a LOT about wrk exp but i think dats ok tho. i read a few ppl who r already in uni their PS's wer gud but not wild or nything so obvsly they dont hav 2 stand out as they got places in uni's :)
     
  5. AdamP

    AdamP New Member

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    Thing is, you never know who's reading your personal statement and if you try to make it too "personal" and tell them what kind of person you are you might come across as being pretentious. I think a nice solid personal statement, detailing what you've learned from all your experiences is better (this is just my opinion)

    Anyone can write "I am a caring person"
     
  6. Ste_Nearly_In_Med_School

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    In my opinion, you need to show what kinda a person you are/have become through achievments, and awards ect. Show what uve done and tell them how that makes you a good candidate for med.
     
  7. AdamP

    AdamP New Member

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    That's what I was trying to get at, yeah. What I'm saying is it should be implied, not said.

    e.g. "I worked for two weeks in a nursing home and spent time playing board games with residents, which I thoroughly enjoyed."

    not

    "I worked for two weeks in a nursing home. It helped me to become a more caring person."


    If you get what I mean...

    (I'm not saying you should write things as simplistically as that though :p)
     
    #7 AdamP, Oct 6, 2006
    Last edited: Oct 6, 2006
  8. Ste_Nearly_In_Med_School

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    hmmm i dunno, i like both of those sentances equally. Uve just gotta make sure ur not overdoing it when talking about urself....
     
  9. AdamP

    AdamP New Member

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    Well there's the proof that everyone has different ideas! At the end of the day I suppose it is personal and what works for one person won't necessarily for another.

    I suppose the moral of this thread might be.. just go with what you think feels right? After all it's your statement...
     
  10. maria_88

    maria_88 New Member

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    About those two sentences... What was wrong with the 2nd one? In know this is a matter of opinion, but...
     
  11. AdamP

    AdamP New Member

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    Nothing apparently <.<

    I know I wouldn't put it on my form though. For the sake of not confusing people and perhaps spreading my bad ideas I should probably delete that post, it already seems redundant
     
  12. Ste_Nearly_In_Med_School

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    Every opinion is valid!
     
  13. AdamP

    AdamP New Member

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    Alright, to me a sentence like that says "I'm just writing this because I know it ticks a box on your criteria". Also it doesn't say how it helped you become a more caring person and lacks any kind of interesting structure
     
  14. maria_88

    maria_88 New Member

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    I fully agree, every opinion is valid and it's good that you justify it!
    I really see the point, but I just thought about my own PS...And no, I didn't write anything like that, but I had huge problems with saying everything I needed to say and explain it thoroughly...I don't know, I'm just stressed about the PS :confused: I'm an EU applicant, so I haven't heard so much about what to write and what to avoid...
     
  15. Fried_Rice

    Fried_Rice New Member

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    I'd say write whatever it is very clearly. Admissions people skim your personal statements I'm afraid, so the clearer and easier it is to read and pick out the 'tick the boxes' things, the better! Having read a fair few personal statements (not that I am an admissions person though!), I just don't like having to read between the lines at things people imply because you can't do that while skimming. Say it clearly, in my opinion.

    That being said, if your personal statement is very 'personal' and has an actual distinct voice, I find myself so drawn in that I can't help but read it carefully. So it's a gamble.

    If you PM me your personal statement I'll have a quick skim through it over the weekend for you. (This is not an offer for random people to spam my PM inbox, only OP, for my sanity's sake please!)
     
  16. AdamP

    AdamP New Member

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    Okay now I'm worried.
     
  17. rozzy

    rozzy New Member

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    yup i think she's right. admissions dont have time to read the hundreds of PS's they get carefully.
     
  18. AdamP

    AdamP New Member

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    Fried Rice is a she? no way
    Isn't it in their best interest to read personal statements carefully though??
     
  19. Fried_Rice

    Fried_Rice New Member

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    Well, they only have a certain amount of time to read a batch of them so having to spend time picking up hints isn't going to help you application. However, to be fair, skim is probably an exaggeration on my part and I apologise for any worry caused. But admissions people don't go through them in such great detail, or at least that is how I understood it was done and how I wrote my personal statment back in the day: easy to read (or skim-read), so you can pick up all the key words and achievements without looking too hard, even though that doesn't make for the most attractive piece of writing - most personal stataments are in fact terribly pretentious things because that is their purpose! They are meant to be you CV in a more fluid form. The CV is there to sell you as is the PS.

    Actually what do I know? I am tired and half ill so i should really be in bed.
     
    #19 Fried_Rice, Oct 6, 2006
    Last edited: Oct 6, 2006
  20. Fried_Rice

    Fried_Rice New Member

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    I am indeed a she. Edited to add: I thought the hearts and such on my signature might give that away! (which was kind of its purpose.)
     

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