My GAMSAT essay.. need comments

Discussion in 'GAMSAT' started by MargieDorman, Sep 14, 2016.

  1. MargieDorman

    MargieDorman New Member

    Sep 14, 2016
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    Please check my GAMSAT essay:

    To have or not to have children

    Having a family was once never thought about because it was normal for every person to have children. With time this expectation has decreased and more controversy is arising. Our society views this as a pronatalism which by deffiniton is “A belief system that promotes childbearing” (Herdt 249). Meaning society expects everyone to have a family and if the couple decides not to, this decision automatically becomes selfish. As we discuss this topic, I have chosen that I will one day have children and will juggle parenthood with my career.

    When I got with my partner, the vey first time that came to my mothers mind was “no grandchildren”, unfortunately at the beginning of my relationship have children was not even a possibility because my girlfriend did not have the same desires as mine. As time has passed, I have convinced her otherwise which has endless options that we can both look into. We are planning on looking into zygote intrafallopian transfer where “implantation of a fertilized ovum in the mother’s fallopian tube” (Herdt 282). Though we are not certain of the decision that is the most clear at this moment. I understand that communication with my partner is crucial. According to Klernan, “research suggest that becoming parents changes how we view ourselves as sexual individuals and also changes our relationships”, which is why we must be very careful not to get lost in the whole parenthood and remember who we are and why we fell in love. From a very young age my thought was to one day conceive, when I met her my plans changed and came to peace with the idea that I was never going to make that dream come true. But we talked about it and she decided to break her rules and that when the time is right we would have one or maybe two. So having children has always been my plan and society did not play a part in pressuring me into my decision.

    With children come a lot of responsibilities as far as who will do what and when it will get done. My partner and I have not thought about this part yet, but I have no doubt that she will help me a lot. After I graduate and have a steady job and am financially stable it will be easier to juggle the responsibilities as far as income coming in and who takes time off and who stays home. As of right now I think I will be the one staying home with the baby. I will have to take a family leave from work, which is “an absence from work, either paid or unpaid, granted so that an employee can give care to a family member, such as a new baby” (Herdt 250). I would be expected to clean the house and do the laundry and possibly have dinner ready for when she gets home. I have taken this responsibility and could only hope that she can help when she comes home from work.

    In the future I hope to be financially stable in order to provide a better life for the baby. At this very moment in time I am aware that I am not financially stable to jump into that big a of a responsibility considering I am unemployed and focusing on school. Buying diapers, formula, and clothes for the baby plus more is very demanding and expensive, so since I am focusing on myself and my future I know I am not capable of caring for another human being just yet. Taking into consideration that I will have to wait a couple of years before I decide to make the decision for sure, my age could be a huge factor. According to Figure 8.2 the maternal age versus the prevalence per 10,0000 births. The older the mother is the higher the risk for down syndrome. So I have to decide that ages between 20 and 30 would be a great time to have our family. I think sometimes in between that time I hope I have m family.

    I know my girlfriend has talked about giving the children an allowance. Every time we get into this topic I get angry because I very strongly disagree, simply for the fact that getting paid to do chores is something that doesn't necessarily help them in any way. No one is going to pay them when they're adults to do their dishes or vacuum the house. We have also decided that as far as religion goes, they will believe that there is a God but it is their choice to decide whether they are catholic, christian, or whatever else they want. It will also be their decision if they want to go to church or prefer to read their bible at home. My kids will know how to take care of themselves and be very responsible while having manners.

    Both of our families are very ecstatic for us to have children and neither one wants us to wait. Her mother wants the grandchildren but does not necessarily want us to get married. While my mother would prefer for us to wait until i’m out of school and have a steady job. But I have no doubt that when the time comes they will both be very supportive, helpful, and excited. As far as agreeing with the choices we make, I would like to believe that they both will respect out choices. My mother will not go against me because she knows that the children are my responsibility and she is only there to give us advice. Her mother is a very controlling and demanding person. I have a feeling she would be one person in front of us and when we are away she will change her words and tell our child differently. But I don’t know what will really happen so I guess we will find out once the time comes.

    As far as health history goes, we both have some pretty nasty diseases in our family. I have colon cancer, depression, high blood pressure, and diabetes. On her side she has kidney stones and high blood pressure. Because of my family history my partner wishes not to reproduce but I disagree, I want a family and no one, not even her is going to stop me from having it.

    I decided to pick this topic because it has a very strong bond with myself. I want a family and even though my partner wishes not to have one I know one day that family will be mine. I know my parents will always be there for me, even if i’m a single parent.

    - Devin from
    - Janine Anderson Robinson from
    - Kimberly Ball from

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